Nintendiots and the death of discussion in Internet forums

Nintendo has turned, like Star Wars or Disney itself, into a cult. All megapopular shallow forms of entertainment eventually do. It's shallow, derivative and empty of any real message for everyone to see and thus all loonies who depend on it to fill their existential void fight for it like fierce crusaders spreading their faith upon the dead bodies of their enemies and detractors.

I'm one of these corpses, piling atop how many others?  How much criticism have these rabid faithful cultists wiped and hid beneath the carpet?  Along the internet years I've used accounts such as nemesis, namekuseijin, fotorama, Erik and a bunch of others in forums such as Metroid Database, Eidolons Inn, slashdot, Reddit, Uol, outerspace and consistently I've been banned or shut down in a way or another - do these people even know what a forum is for?

And all for stating the obvious: Nintendo makes the same kiddy games since the 80s over and over and their consoles are crappy obsolete hardware running only old games and retro indies. Somehow, stating simple, direct observation facts is enough to grant you a ban.  It's like stating the king is naked or God is nowhere to be found.

Discussion is dead nowadays, you can't get intelligent, reasonable discussion with arguments anywhere in the Internet these days. Current human race representatives are barely more interesting to try to hold a conversation with than a potato. It's all about dumbly pointing fingers up or down at people pointing fingers. Congrats, Fakebook.

This is why I'm resorting to my soliloquies at a blog again. This and dialoguing with long dead book authors in their old pages is the only way to get any kind of interesting discussion in a world ridden by blind cultists busy with their gatekeeping.

Deadvania

Dead Cells is a metroidvania rogue-like with melee swordfighting combat akin to Dark Souls - which is the only metroidvania millennials know and they like it not for the exploration of expansive organic maps, but for being punished over and over by giant bosses. That is to say, they rush through the whole level without paying attention to minor enemies or the ingenious level design just to reach bosses and get their sorry masochistic asses kicked.  This is how Dead Cells plays, except for the lack of any ingenious level layout.

It's just an uninspired procedurally-generated level with familiar elements repeated over.  You'll die a lot and see these same elements in different order as the maps change.  The maps are irrelevant, unlike in true metroidvanias and even in Dark Souls: you can just run in a direction and you'll hardly hit any dead ends or secret passages, more likely the end of the level.

Visually it's beautiful, though I don't understand the need for pixel "art" to somehow try to legitimize this as a game worthy of the classics - hardly any of these millennial games going for the "art" ( or should I say limitation?) of the classics go for the kind of hard gameplay of the oldies.  Though this one is harder than usual, probably due to the challenge to rush through the level with little regard to your health and safety. You'll get tons of innocuous upgrades for all your diligent rogue dying. The more upgrades, the longer you can endure rushing through irrelevant level layout filled with ever more of the same simple foes...

Frankly, it feels more like an irrelevant mobile infinite runner than a classic metroidvania. It's sad

AC Odyssey is the best flat game this generation

A true heroic Odyssey, a fine historical reconstruction, a mishmash of references to histories, myths, legends and to other games. It takes the best out of AC, The Witcher 3, Horizon ZD, Shadow of Mordor and even GoW and brings it all beyond.

And it's absolutely huge! Took me 9 hours of feverish and sheer joyful exploration and hard combat (at least playing on hard) to leave the initial islands of Cefalonia and Ithaca and watch the title screen!  I looked at the map and how tiny that is compared to what is to come - and yet Cefalonia alone is quite big by itself and full of variation in geology and looks, from forests to beautiful beaches, to the top of mountains where a huge stone Zeus aims his thunder arrows.

That sea is really something to see.  This game is gorgeous looking already, but its sea is really surreal, specially with that special sunlight. Dolphins, ships, sharks, whales, albatrosses, it's all alive. How far they've come with their engine since AC Black Flag.  Sea exploration is awesome, crucial to the gameplay, combat is very nice and now the ship got upgrades, including recruiting new crew.

Speaking of combat, lots of goodies to speak there. First, lots of different weapons, including lances, swords, daggers, axes, etc. You now, much like in Bloodborne or GoW, hit with shoulder buttons - a weak attack (R1), a strong one (R2) and ranged attacks with a bow (L2 to aim, R2 to shoot). Plus  as you upgrade your skill tree you slowly get more options, like charge attacks and others that you choose where to go in the buttons layout, both for melee (like Spartan kick) and ranged (like multiple arrows). Timing blocks for counterattacks is crucial, but you may also just dodge as in Witcher or Dark Souls.  Some of the finishing moves in weakened enemies are brutal and in slow motion much like in these games as well.

The old Zelda OoT mechanism to focus on an enemy at a time that so many other games used is still in place and works really well. Easy to change the focus, though not easy to deal with several at once. As always, the best option is either to run and hide and try to take out as many as possible stealthily before direct confrontation.

Your eagle is a valiant asset here, flying and scoping the area, finding treasures and informing you of enemies positions. It seems some skill updates can also bring some of her fighting powers to your side. Valiant ally indeed. I missed Origins and thus never played with the eagle before. At first I used her just to leisurely take a better look at those breathtaking vistas and scenarios - it's surreal, really. Just slowly I realized she has a real function in the aforementioned attributes.  BTW, I think she's a better way to take a look at your surroundings than the old AC eagle view, where it worked like an Animus virtual sonar of sorts to bring to attention vital information. This way is more natural, and requires you yourself to carefully scan the area for threats and opportunities. The eagle was always linked to AC from the first trailer and the beaked design of the hood... it's good to see it physically materialized. BTW, she comes to the hands of Kassandra in shops or during periods when you don't move the character. Beautiful sight.

I'm playing as Kassandra. Doesn't fit historically with an all-male Greek society where women and slaves didn't have political rights - specially, say, in militaristic Sparta.  But it's a historical virtual reconstruction in the Animus by 2 modern day women archeologists, so hey... it's fun anyway to see her kicking the ass of larger foes and she's beautiful to look at anyway. I wonder what she'll do once she reaches that poetically mythical island of Lesbos.

Now let's talk a bit about the interface?  It's cleaner than in past AC, where it could get very polluted. But of course, the amount of cluttering depends on what you choose to show - I go with a minimalistic option showing just vital info, like enemies health and some mission markers. About main menu interface itself, some of the most neat and downright good-looking I've seen in any game. It's got this nightly look to it and the text and icons are the right size and easily conveyed and separated by tabs. Kassandra shows up close in her highest LOD much like Kratos in GoW without however bringing the cooler to take off.  The menus never slow down as sometimes in The Witcher. I'd say it takes menus from these games and also HZD and further polishes them.

I've mentioned Shadow of Mordor as an influence, right?  Enemies can place a bounty on your head and strong mercenaries show up for it. You can see markers for them in the map so you can avoid or confront and boy are these fights hard - guess further on I can expect Valkyrie-level fights.  I think further on you may also recruit some of these mercenaries to your side and make them go against other bounty hunters - mimicking some of the play mechanics that Shadow of Mordor brought to the game world with their famed Nemesis system.

Speaking of influences, I don't want to spoil much but there's a character that looks just like King Leonid in the movie 300 and is nicknamed - wait for it - The Wolf of Sparta! Bwahaha isn't that a reference to both the Ghost of Sparta and the White Wolf?

srsly, this game got so much to it and is so full of the source for all heroes in legends and games that it's now easily my favorite flat game this generation